KEW Episode 56: Domestication

Don Miguel Ruiz, author of many books including ‘The Four Agreements: A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom (A Toltec Wisdom Book)‘ uses the term “Domestication” to describe the process by which humans are taught how to live. I have been fascinated by this process, whatever you wish to call it, for as long as I can remember. In fact, I still wonder, often out loud, why no one ever asked whether or not I was agreeing to this social contract. See, we are born into a world that teaches us many things before we even know what’s happening to us.

And a social contract is very much what domestication is like. We are taught so many things. How to eat, how to walk, how to speak, what to believe in, where Santa Claus lives, which religion is best, whether or not skin color matters. . . . The list is infinite. We are TAUGHT these things. Many of these things are opinions, some of them are factual, and very few of them are valuable.

Because some rules are totally important. Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. Don’t spit at people. Don’t eat raw kittens. So, sure, some of the domestication process is good and even fundamentally necessary to a healthy society.

The PROBLEM IS, that much of the domestication process is not only unnecessary, it’s unfair. And in the context of the Are vs. Should Problem, domestication becomes the Should Bully by teaching us what to think, how to act, and what or whom to believe in.

And the WORST part is, much of this domestication occurs before we can consent. We are, in fact, brainwashed at very early ages to follow the rules. Again, some of this is good, but a lot of it is NOT. But it’s ok, IF we understand this and can go back and edit ourselves, or update what we believe, feel, and do as we grow and change.

The lucky ones, usually in our teenage years but often again in mid life, realize we have learned some weird shit. At certain times in our lives we QUESTION our own beliefs. We get CURIOUS about our thoughts. We WONDER who is really making our decisions. If we’re lucky something encourages us to question WHO WE ARE. It is at these times we have a chance to take back our lives, our minds, and our DNA.

This week I share my thoughts about the Domestication process, discuss the damages caused, and provide a warning about our future. Solutions are necessary and urgent. Please follow this series and help me find some.

Link to podcast download here: https://pdcn.co/e/https://chtbl.com/track/CGDA9D/www.buzzsprout.com/530563/8947786-kew-episode-56-domestication.mp3?download=true

or, please subscribe to the KEW podcast on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, etc.

Link to YouTube video here: https://youtu.be/kVRRKf2zh6k

Preview KEW Episode 32: Work/Life Balance

Since I was a kid I have been obsessed with how to make room for the things I want in my life and the things I have to do to get them. At thirteen I got a paper route and realized part of my life did not belong to me. I was taught (as most of us are) that I would have to trade some of my time working to earn the time to use for myself. It sounds silly when you say it that way, but most of us made these same agreements whether we realize it or not.

I continue to struggle trying to balance my work with my life. Some have suggested I make my life my work; to follow my passion. That sounds nice. Others have said to learn how to suck it up and concede to losing 40 hours a week of my life to a soul sucking cubicle job. That sounds really crappy (and it is, I’ve done it). Heck, I even tried to follow the ‘American Dream’, got a PhD, and my ‘dream job’ (spoiler alert, that didn’t work, either).

This week I share my perspective, as well as other peoples’ views on work, life, and trying to get just the right amount of each.

Video preview here: https://business.facebook.com/kpluseiswise/videos/190643142729229/

Full episode coming Friday.

Flashback to KEW Episode 2: Individuals and Communities

Our unique identities are important – we are all unique and add to the worlds’ diversity. But we also must participate in various communities. We follow norms and laws so that we can peacefully and safely interact with the people around us.

But how far should we go in either direction? Is no man (person) an island? Should we outlaw hermits? Do we need to consider everyone’s feelings or rights when going about our business?

My thoughts on our responsibilities to ourselves and others.

Preview video link here: https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=965397907277198

Full video in the archives