Fellow humans, your shortsightedness is showing One of the downsides to human evolution is that we’re not very good at seeing things from outside our perspective. Simultaneously, we struggle to live in the moment, spending most of our time worrying about the past or the future. We are in our…
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A Codependency Manifesto
What loving yourself really means. We’ve all heard it. To love someone else, you have to love yourself first. I can’t tell you how many times this has been said to me in therapy. I even conducted a lengthy podcast interview series, and nearly every guest said the same thing. …
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I Made Peace With My Anxiety, Can I Make Peace With Yours?
Differential healing in relationships Photo by Pawel Czerwinski on Unsplash Self-help is a funny thing. It both defines and sickens me. While I firmly believe the only healthy growth is the personal kind, I also wish I could leave it alone. Sometimes, I secretly envy the rugged hypermasculine individuals who cry ‘woke’ and…
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Sailing in the Shadow of the Buddha
A brief summary of a life-changing epic tale Our shared dream started before the pandemic. I wanted my wife to quit her soul-crushing job in medicine, she wanted adventure. We could do something different once our third daughter graduated. We decided to sell everything and live on a boat. We…
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Creativity, Imposter Syndrome, and Not Having Language to Describe Who You Are
No one teaches us that we can be different; we just are I’m wrestling with something and need help. Maybe you are, too. Maybe you can help me. Maybe we can all help each other. Backstory I didn’t know what I wanted to be when I went to college over…
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Not Taking Things Personally Is the Hardest Thing I’ve Ever Tried to Do
But it may be the most rewarding skill we can learn I’ve been ‘in therapy’ for almost two decades. For about one-third of my life, I have sought help from others to heal my emotional wounds. I’m not weird or special. According to SAMHSA, over 50 million Americans received mental health…
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I Wish I Had a Ticket to Ride
A Beatle’s song and a dream of freedom Like many gen-Xers, the Beatles were my introduction to music. Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band was my first meaningful musical experience and changed my life. The album (yes, my early moments were with my parent’s vinyl) remains one of my top…
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Inventions Other Mother
Playfulness and curiosity in Natural Selection “Necessity is the mother of invention” While we don’t know who first said it, many people have. Surely you have heard this phrase, if not used it. This quote means that urgency induces creativity. When humans need something, we search harder for solutions. It…
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How Did I Get Here?
In the bottom of this hole Has it been that long? Have you ever gotten a glimpse of reality that disagreed with whatever truth you thought was real? I feel like I have been surrounded by darkness, gaslighting myself into believing it was the weather. The climate. Where I lived….