Knowing yourself is an important part of being a complete human. Maybe this is just my opinion based on my own values, but it seems to be a theme. Throughout history there have been thinkers proclaiming the importance of knowing oneself.
To justify this conclusion we can look at the opposite side of the coin.
What is NOT knowing yourself like?
To me, not knowing yourself leads to lots of misbehaviors. Breaking societal norms (which arguable can be a good thing), committing crimes and not obeying laws, or just being an asshole. I think of ‘bad’ human behaviors as being associated with people to are clueless. Who lack self-awareness. Who don’t know themselves.
Because why would anyone do the wrong thing if they know they are doing the wrong thing? Out of desperation, probably. I understand that a starving person would steal bread. I don’t get why someone would commit hate crimes against outgroups. I assume that is, at least in part, a result of being clueless.
Anyway, this Episode is about knowing yourself. And I think to know ourselves we have to examine our choices. Especially the choices we didn’t know we were making.
As kids, we learned a lot of stuff. How to use a toilet. How to walk and talk. Hopefully, to be kind to people. This type of cultural conditioning and learning is important to a ‘good’ society.
We also learned about religion, history, and politics.
These subconscious and non-consensual teachings can become part of us. And I think it is a critical part of being human to become aware of what we chose and what we did not choose.
For example, some people believe in a Christian God who says being homosexual is wrong and punishable by being sent to hell. I wonder how many of these folks have ever really explored that belief. Taken it apart and thought about where it came from and what it actually means. I think much of this was non-consensual.
And so it’s important to take a personal inventory of what and why you believe what you do. This is a critical first step toward deconstructing and knowing yourself.
So Radical Acceptance is an interesting topic that follows from deciding to know yourself. Once you decide who you are and what you believe, you need to accept it. Of course, you are a dynamic individual who will change and grow, but you can monitor these changes and modify if necessary.
Accepting yourself AS YOU ARE, after you inventory and re-decide your beliefs, is one of the keys to personal growth.
Once you question your beliefs you create dissonance. Between the person you ARE and the person you WERE (or felt you ‘should be’). Because these disagreements can be polarizing and confusing, you must ACCEPT and KNOW yourself so you can remember the difference.
Old beliefs are so strong they will pull at you and try to convince you to come back. This ain’t easy.
Radical acceptance helps you remember yourself. And love who you are.
Remember you are ok.