Spoiler alert? We can’t and we don’t
Do ever joke that we’re living in the Matrix?
Most of us have done this. It’s funny to think the world is so mechanical or programmed that we’re just victims of the program or the algorithm.
I often refer to the movie when talking about the problems of the world. Sometimes it does seem like we’re living in a computer simulation. Or does it? How would we even know what that feels like? To me, this is a question like the ‘hard problem of consciousness’. It’s fun to think about, but what difference does it make?
Anyway, I was inspired to do this episode by the idea that the future might be predetermined. Or, more to the point, that we can do anything about the future.
Many of us seem to think we can. A common psychological error many of us commit is future prediction. Mind reading, catastrophic thinking, and worst-case-scenario thinking are common versions of this fallacy.
I learned that my anxiety was directly related to this erroneous belief.
Check this out. I actually thought that my worrying could control the outcome of my future. Seriously. I believed that if I worried hard enough I could create a positive outcome down the road.
Many of us do this and with good reason. We are protecting ourselves from future suffering by trying to understand the possible future scenarios. The worst-case-scenario thing comes up because we believe if we prepare ourselves for the worst we can handle anything.
Protecting ourselves from future suffering is honorable. But often it just isn’t true. There is no causal relationship between our worry or anxiety and any future outcome or experience. Think about it. If we could predict the future who wouldn’t we be predicting more positive outcomes? Hell, go to Las Vegas and gamble can’t we will ourselves to win? When I say it like that how much sense does it make? Again, not knocking these behaviors.
Our worry about the future is likely adaptive.
It probably helped us evolve by being hyper-aware of the potential outcomes. We were likely able to avoid danger and learn from the past. No one is arguing that this is helpful. Except when we create problems now that induce more suffering than any future scenario could.
Like weather forecasters, we pull data from our experience and predict outcomes for our future selves. We erroneously believe our hypervigilance protects us by ensuring we don’t encounter situations we can’t handle. As if preparing for a worst-case helps us navigate the experience.
And maybe it does, but the problem is we spend too much time worrying and being anxious. This is entirely human. It’s something we do. It is automatic. It requires a lot of work to NOT do it.
How do we beat our central nervous system?
Or, how do we beat the matrix? It doesn’t matter if you believe we’re in the matrix or not, this strategy applies. How do we teach ourselves a new way of thinking so that our automatic (and damaging) thoughts don’t continue to run our lives?
The first step is admitting you have a problem. To do this requires self-awareness. Even with self-awareness, the fear doesn’t go away. So we need courage. Identifying and reconsidering our beliefs and values also helps. Often, it is easy to see the error of our ways. Sometimes, it isn’t so simple.
There are many techniques to help with this. The entire self-help industry exists in support of changing our behaviors and beliefs. The problem thus becomes knowing how to differentiate between the people who can actually help and the snake oil. Again, self-awareness is the first step. Often, getting help is the second.
There has to be a better way.
Acceptance. Letting go of the need for control. Making room for change. And the unknown. Therapy modalities that help identify and change old and limiting beliefs. Wu-Wei. Being ok with sitting with ourselves in quiet.
This may be harder for neurodivergent people because our coping mechanisms are often stronger. The stakes are higher for people who are truly afraid of being abandoned or cast out of their family or community.
I used to spend a lot of time worrying about the future. I truly thought in doing so I could control the outcome. This worst-case scenario or catastrophic thinking ruled my life. It sucked. Hard. I was always anxious. It made me sick.
Having a practice has helped give me a chance to become aware of subconscious beliefs and change them. My practice includes a healthy diet, exercise, sleep, meditation, mindfulness, and therapy. I can’t say exactly what will work for you, but I believe figuring it out is worth it. Building a practice will improve your life.
Remember, you can NOT predict the future. So why bother trying?
You can subscribe to The Neurodivergent Professor podcast wherever you find podcasts, or download this episode directly here:
https://www.buzzsprout.com/530563/14595407
You can also find TDP on YouTube and Episode 166 is here:
I mention a few other episodes you might be interested in:
Episode 4: Quiet vs Distraction –
All I hear lately is that mindfulness meditation is the magic cure all for human problems like anxiety, depression, and…chrisburcher.com