Have you heard people say that you can’t control what happens to you, but you CAN control how you react to what happens to you?
It’s so true, but it isn’t easy.
We all want some degree of control in our lives. Or wish for it. Long for it.
But control is an illusion.
I’m not saying life is 100% chaotic and unpredictable, but being attached to controlling things really only wears you out.
I have learned that if I let go of (a little bit of) control my life is more comfortable.
And increasing comfort (and calm, and peace) is my goal.
How, then, do we figure out how to live with less control?
One of the ways is simply called ‘mindfulness’. And choosing a particular direction or frequency of your mind is called a ‘mindset’.
Choosing to be mindful in a particular mindset is how.
And, as you see on the internet, there are thousands of resources for being mindful or changing your mindset.
But what I have found is, you have to make a huge effort to direct your own path.
In other words, this is mostly a DIY project.
Yes, you need to learn what you want – and that’s what we are doing now on KEW, applying the Are vs Should Problem and figuring out how to live more in our AREs and less in our SHOULDs.
So you really have to sit down and figure out what your values are, what your dreams are, what gets you out of bed in the morning, and what you WANT for your life.
But I’ll tell you, being mindful – being aware, being able to direct your attention, being able to change your perspective from focusing solely on yourself to that of an observer and even other people – is key.
Mindfulness essentially means paying attention to your thoughts and checking them against your values.
Mindset, again, is a flavor of mindfulness.
Growth mindsets choose to admit they don’t know everything and are open to learning.
Abundance mindsets choose to believe the world has abundant resources for them.
A mindset of connectedness chooses to believe all people are connected and thus affect one another.
In other words, your mindset flavor is a choice.
Do you choose to live a fulfilled life of joy and calm?
Or do you choose to focus on what you don’t have?
What do you choose?
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